This couple had been dating for about six months, but charlie had been afraid to make any sexual advances because of his tiny organ.
Finally one night, he gets up his courage, and takes her to a secluded spot in his car.
While they are kissing, he opens his zipper and guides her hand onto his penis.
"No thanks," the girl says. "You know I don't smoke."
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#962
Charlie Bhoy
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Posted 10 May 2012 - 03:03 PM
hoopz, on 10 May 2012 - 02:59 PM, said:
This couple had been dating for about six months, but charlie had been afraid to make any sexual advances because of his tiny organ.
Finally one night, he gets up his courage, and takes her to a secluded spot in his car.
While they are kissing, he opens his zipper and guides her hand onto his penis.
"No thanks," the girl says. "You know I don't smoke."
Finally one night, he gets up his courage, and takes her to a secluded spot in his car.
While they are kissing, he opens his zipper and guides her hand onto his penis.
"No thanks," the girl says. "You know I don't smoke."
HERE IS TAE 2 IN A ROW.........
#963
hoopz
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Posted 10 May 2012 - 03:05 PM
Charlie Bhoy, on 10 May 2012 - 03:03 PM, said:
Cant he have a different name....
#964
hoopz
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Posted 10 May 2012 - 03:06 PM
wis gonna be dug be wouldnt have sounded right lol
#965
Bundy
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C'Mon You Reds
Posted 10 May 2012 - 03:06 PM
hoopz, on 10 May 2012 - 02:59 PM, said:
This couple had been dating for about six months, but charlie had been afraid to make any sexual advances because of his tiny organ.
Finally one night, he gets up his courage, and takes her to a secluded spot in his car.
While they are kissing, he opens his zipper and guides her hand onto his penis.
"No thanks," the girl says. "You know I don't smoke."
Finally one night, he gets up his courage, and takes her to a secluded spot in his car.
While they are kissing, he opens his zipper and guides her hand onto his penis.
"No thanks," the girl says. "You know I don't smoke."
Must be some size of car he's got
"Game On"
#966
hoopz
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Posted 10 May 2012 - 03:08 PM
Bundy, on 10 May 2012 - 03:06 PM, said:
Must be some size of car he's got
#967
black dog
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The Dog's Bollocks
Posted 10 May 2012 - 03:09 PM
hoopz, on 10 May 2012 - 03:06 PM, said:
wis gonna be dug be wouldnt have sounded right lol
Cheeky bassa....
STAND UP FOR THE SFF
#968
black dog
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The Dog's Bollocks
Posted 10 May 2012 - 03:15 PM
Charlie Bhoy, on 10 May 2012 - 03:03 PM, said:
Cant he have a different name....
Nothin' tae be ashamed of mate....
STAND UP FOR THE SFF
#969
JHR
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Posted 10 May 2012 - 05:29 PM
ADVICE FROM A RETIRED HUSBAND
It is important for men to remember that, as women grow older, it becomes harder for them to maintain the same quality of housekeeping as when they were younger. When you notice this, try not to yell at them. Some are oversensitive, and there's nothing worse than an oversensitive woman.
My name is Dave. Let me relate how I handled the situation with my wife.
When I retired a few years ago, it became necessary for Felicity to get a full-time job, along with her part-time job, both for extra income and for the health benefits that we needed.
Shortly after she started working, I noticed she was beginning to show her age. I usually get home from the golf club about the same time she gets home from work.
Although she knows how hungry I am, she almost always says she has to rest for half an hour or so before she starts dinner. I don't yell at her.Instead, I tell her to take her time and just wake me when she gets dinner on the table.
I generally have lunch in the Men's Grill at the club, so eating out is not reasonable. I'm ready for some home-cooked grub when I hit that door.
She used to do the dishes as soon as we finished eating. But now it's not unusual for them to sit on the table for several hours after dinner. I do what I can by diplomatically reminding her several times each evening that they won't clean themselves. I know she really appreciates this, as it does seem to motivate her to get them done before she goes to bed.
Another symptom of aging is complaining, I think. For example, she will say that it is difficult for her to find time to pay the monthly bills during her lunch hour. But, Boys, we take 'em for better or worse, so I just smile and offer encouragement. I tell her to stretch it out over two, or even three days. That way, she won't have to rush so much. I also remind her that missing lunch completely now and then wouldn't hurt her any (if you know what I mean). I like to think tact is one of my strong points.
When doing simple jobs, she seems to think she needs more rest periods. She had to take a break when she was only half-finished mowing the yard. I try not to make a scene. I'm a fair man. I tell her to fix herself a nice, big, cold glass of freshly squeezed lemonade and just sit for a while. And, as long as she is making one for herself, she may as well make one for me, too.
I know that I probably look like a saint in the way I support my wife. I'm not saying that showing this much consideration is easy. Many men will find it difficult. Some will find it impossible! Nobody knows better than I do how frustrating women get as they get older. However, Guys, even if you just use a little more tact and less criticism of your aging wife because of this article, I will consider that writing it was well worthwhile. After all, we are put on this earth to help each other.
EDITOR'S NOTE:
Dave died suddenly on November 29 of a perforated rectum. The police report says he was found with a Calloway extra-long 50-inch Big Bertha Driver II golf club jammed up his rear end, with barely 5 inches of grip showing, and a sledge hammer laying nearby. His wife was arrested and charged with murder. The all-woman jury took only 10 minutes to find her Not Guilty, accepting her defense that Dave, somehow without looking, accidentally sat down on his golf club.
It is important for men to remember that, as women grow older, it becomes harder for them to maintain the same quality of housekeeping as when they were younger. When you notice this, try not to yell at them. Some are oversensitive, and there's nothing worse than an oversensitive woman.
My name is Dave. Let me relate how I handled the situation with my wife.
When I retired a few years ago, it became necessary for Felicity to get a full-time job, along with her part-time job, both for extra income and for the health benefits that we needed.
Shortly after she started working, I noticed she was beginning to show her age. I usually get home from the golf club about the same time she gets home from work.
Although she knows how hungry I am, she almost always says she has to rest for half an hour or so before she starts dinner. I don't yell at her.Instead, I tell her to take her time and just wake me when she gets dinner on the table.
I generally have lunch in the Men's Grill at the club, so eating out is not reasonable. I'm ready for some home-cooked grub when I hit that door.
She used to do the dishes as soon as we finished eating. But now it's not unusual for them to sit on the table for several hours after dinner. I do what I can by diplomatically reminding her several times each evening that they won't clean themselves. I know she really appreciates this, as it does seem to motivate her to get them done before she goes to bed.
Another symptom of aging is complaining, I think. For example, she will say that it is difficult for her to find time to pay the monthly bills during her lunch hour. But, Boys, we take 'em for better or worse, so I just smile and offer encouragement. I tell her to stretch it out over two, or even three days. That way, she won't have to rush so much. I also remind her that missing lunch completely now and then wouldn't hurt her any (if you know what I mean). I like to think tact is one of my strong points.
When doing simple jobs, she seems to think she needs more rest periods. She had to take a break when she was only half-finished mowing the yard. I try not to make a scene. I'm a fair man. I tell her to fix herself a nice, big, cold glass of freshly squeezed lemonade and just sit for a while. And, as long as she is making one for herself, she may as well make one for me, too.
I know that I probably look like a saint in the way I support my wife. I'm not saying that showing this much consideration is easy. Many men will find it difficult. Some will find it impossible! Nobody knows better than I do how frustrating women get as they get older. However, Guys, even if you just use a little more tact and less criticism of your aging wife because of this article, I will consider that writing it was well worthwhile. After all, we are put on this earth to help each other.
EDITOR'S NOTE:
Dave died suddenly on November 29 of a perforated rectum. The police report says he was found with a Calloway extra-long 50-inch Big Bertha Driver II golf club jammed up his rear end, with barely 5 inches of grip showing, and a sledge hammer laying nearby. His wife was arrested and charged with murder. The all-woman jury took only 10 minutes to find her Not Guilty, accepting her defense that Dave, somehow without looking, accidentally sat down on his golf club.
54 and counting - We welcome the chase
Light travels faster than sound.This is why some people appear bright. Until you hear them speak
Light travels faster than sound.This is why some people appear bright. Until you hear them speak
#970
Big Bluenose Bear
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It's Mr Big Bluenose Bear to you!!
Posted 11 May 2012 - 01:32 PM
Panic at Rangers as Edu, Bedoya and Bocanegra have left the club after reading the "YANK GO HOME" banner!
Kyle Lafferty has also left after misreading it......
Kyle Lafferty has also left after misreading it......
#971
Charlie Bhoy
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Football Legend
Posted 11 May 2012 - 02:13 PM
Was gettin excited when my new girlfriend sent me a text saying she loves anal..
Turns out the the dyslexic bitch loves alan my best mate..
Turns out the the dyslexic bitch loves alan my best mate..
HERE IS TAE 2 IN A ROW.........
#972
Charlie Bhoy
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Football Legend
Posted 11 May 2012 - 02:15 PM
My wife came out the shower & intae the bedroom naked.. She says shut the curtains babe in case the neighbours see me.
I said dont worry when they see you they will shut there own fuckin curtains..
I said dont worry when they see you they will shut there own fuckin curtains..
HERE IS TAE 2 IN A ROW.........
#973
Charlie Bhoy
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Football Legend
Posted 11 May 2012 - 02:19 PM
Fat bloke goes tae the doctor 2 find out why he cant get rid of the belly..
The doctor says "youve got an over active"...... The bloke says what ? Thyroid?..
No knife & fork ya fat cunt......... The doctor replies...
The doctor says "youve got an over active"...... The bloke says what ? Thyroid?..
No knife & fork ya fat cunt......... The doctor replies...
HERE IS TAE 2 IN A ROW.........
#974
Charlie Bhoy
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Football Legend
Posted 11 May 2012 - 02:22 PM
When i heard there was a cure 4 dyslexia it was like music tae ma arse..
HERE IS TAE 2 IN A ROW.........
#975
Charlie Bhoy
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Football Legend
Posted 11 May 2012 - 02:25 PM
When i confronted my wife about me thinkin she was havin an affair she said yes its with your mate Abdul..
I kicked the keek out of her there & then..
Fuckin accusing me of havin a mate called abdul ffs...
I kicked the keek out of her there & then..
Fuckin accusing me of havin a mate called abdul ffs...
HERE IS TAE 2 IN A ROW.........
#976
Big Bluenose Bear
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It's Mr Big Bluenose Bear to you!!
Posted 11 May 2012 - 03:38 PM
Being a Rangers fans a bit like being in Joseph Fritzels basement.
Everytime you see a glimmer of light ...... you get fucked!!!
Everytime you see a glimmer of light ...... you get fucked!!!
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